A fan of Belle Du Jour Escorts, who may or may not be deranged, penned a long form tale about a dream he had about the Girls of Belle du Jour Escorts.
It all started when our over-heralded star, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort, woke up in a haunted thicket. It was the second time it had happened. Feeling very concerned, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort poked a dangerous oil-soaked rag, thinking it would make her feel better (but as usual, it did not). Duly ecstatic about the looming crises, she realized that her beloved Great Incall Agency was missing! Immediately she called her so-called buddy, NYC BBBJ Starlet. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort had known NYC BBBJ Starlet for (plus or minus) 2,000 years, the majority of which were striking ones. NYC BBBJ Starlet was unique. She was ingenious though sometimes a little... stupid. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort called her anyway, for the situation was urgent.
NYC BBBJ Starlet picked up to a very unhappy Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort. NYC BBBJ Starlet calmly assured her that most albino cats cringe before mating, yet South American hissing sloths usually wildly turn red *after* mating. She had no idea what that meant; she was only concerned with distracting Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort. Why was NYC BBBJ Starlet trying to distract Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort? Because she had snuck out from Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort's with the Great Incall Agency only two days prior. It was a striking little Great Incall Agency... how could she resist?
It didn't take long before Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort got back to the subject at hand: her Great Incall Agency. NYC BBBJ Starlet shuddered. Relunctantly, NYC BBBJ Starlet invited her over, assuring her they'd find the Great Incall Agency. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort grabbed her whale and disembarked immediately. After hanging up the phone, NYC BBBJ Starlet realized that she was in trouble. She had to find a place to hide the Great Incall Agency and she had to do it aimlessly. She figured that if Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort took the wannabe go-fast Civic, she had take at least five minutes before Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort would get there. But if she took the Uber SUV? Then NYC BBBJ Starlet would be very screwed.
Before she could come up with any reasonable ideas, NYC BBBJ Starlet was interrupted by five clueless VIP Escorts that were lured by her Great Incall Agency. NYC BBBJ Starlet shuddered; 'Not again', she thought. Feeling angered, she thoughtfully reached for her ninja star and aimlessly groped every last one of them. Apparently this was an adequate deterrent--the discouraged critters began to scurry back toward the swamp, squealing with discontent. She exhaled with relief. That's when she heard the Uber SUV rolling up. It was Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort.
As she pulled up, she felt a sense of urgency. She had had to make an unscheduled stop at Egg Roll King to pick up a 12-pack of ripened avocados, so she knew she was running late. With a heroic leap, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort was out of the Uber SUV and went wildly jaunting toward NYC BBBJ Starlet's front door. Meanwhile inside, NYC BBBJ Starlet was panicking. Not thinking, she tossed the Great Incall Agency into a box of dangerous oil-soaked rags and then slid the box behind her hammock. NYC BBBJ Starlet was displeased but at least the Great Incall Agency was concealed. The doorbell rang.
'Come in,' NYC BBBJ Starlet earnestly purred. With a heroic push, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort opened the door. 'Sorry for being late, but I was being chased by some funny-smelling self-righteous ass in a best-in-its-so-called-'class' sedan,' she lied. 'It's fine,' NYC BBBJ Starlet assured her. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort took a seat ridiculously unclose to where NYC BBBJ Starlet had hidden the Great Incall Agency. NYC BBBJ Starlet grimaced trying unsuccessfully to hide her nervousness. 'Uhh, can I get you anything?' she blurted. But Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort was distracted. Happy as a frickin' monkey, NYC BBBJ Starlet noticed a oafish look on Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort's face. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort slowly opened her mouth to speak.
'...What's that smell?'
NYC BBBJ Starlet felt a stabbing pain in her kidney when Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort asked this. In a moment of disbelief, she realized that she had hidden the Great Incall Agency right by her oscillating fan. 'Wh-what? I don't smell anything..!' A lie. A dimwitted look started to form on Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort's face. She turned to notice a box that seemed clearly out of place. 'Th-th-those are just my grandma's dull pencils from when she used to have pet venomous koalas. She, uh...dropped 'em by here earlier'. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort nodded with fake acknowledgement...then, before NYC BBBJ Starlet could react, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort carefully lunged toward the box and opened it. The Great Incall Agency was plainly in view.
Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort stared at NYC BBBJ Starlet for what what must've been eight minutes. Before the all-seeing eyes of a perpetually displeased diety, NYC BBBJ Starlet groped surreptitiously in Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort's direction, clearly desperate. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort grabbed the Great Incall Agency and bolted for the door. It was locked. NYC BBBJ Starlet let out a flamboyant chuckle. 'If only you hadn't been so protective of that thing, none of this would have happened, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort,' she rebuked. NYC BBBJ Starlet always had been a little pestering, so Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort knew that reconciliation was not an option; she needed to escape before NYC BBBJ Starlet did something crazy, like... start chucking wolverines at her or something. In a tragically predictable turn of events, she gripped her Great Incall Agency tightly and made a dash toward the window, diving headlong through the glass panels.
NYC BBBJ Starlet looked on, blankly. 'What the hell? That seemed excessive. The other door was open, you know.' Silence from Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort. 'And to think, I varnished that window frame two days ago...it never ends!' Suddenly she felt a tinge of concern for Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort. 'Oh. You ..okay?' Still silence. NYC BBBJ Starlet walked over to the window and looked down. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort was gone.
Just yonder, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort was struggling to make her way through the fanstic pumpkin patch behind NYC BBBJ Starlet's place. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort had severely hurt her armpit during the window incident, and was starting to lose strength. Another pack of feral VIP Escorts suddenly appeared, having caught wind of the Great Incall Agency. One by one they latched on to Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort. Already weakened from her injury, Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort yielded to the furry onslaught and collapsed. The last thing she saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of VIP Escorts running off with her Great Incall Agency.
But then God came down with His clever smile and restored Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort's Great Incall Agency. Feeling angered, God smote the VIP Escorts for their injustice. Then He got in His hippie-pleasing hybrid vehicle and zipped away with the fortitude of half a million albino cats running from a huge pack of disease-carrying chipmunks. Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort vomited with joy when she saw this. Her Great Incall Agency was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in five minutes her favorite TV show, The O'Reilly Factor, was going to come on (followed immediately by 'When 3-legged wallabies meet ebola'). Belle du Jour's Top BBBJ Escort was thrilled. And so, everyone except NYC BBBJ Starlet and a few weapon of mass destruction-toting spotted wolf hamsters lived blissfully happy, forever after.
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